Who are you?

“I need to put the kids first! The kids schedule takes up all my time. My only free time is when the baby naps and any free time I have at home is spent doing housework. I need to play with the kids more. I need to volunteer in their class or as their coach, to be a good mom. They need me to do it. I’ve just accepted that this is my life, I mean, I’m a mom now…” Do these statements sound familiar? Sure, many of them are supported with great intentions and can be beneficial, even necessary at times. Some rang true for me for far too long, so this post is definitely not one threaded with guilt and shame. This post is one to encourage you mama’s that those statements don’t have to define you.

Don’t let the smile fool you because behind it is a very insecure woman who only knew herself as Mom and didn’t even think she was doing that right. -Wert Family 2014

Most of those statements are supported by cups of coffee reheated for the umpteenth time, bags under the eyes, hair up in a messy top knot, yoga pants (need I say more) and yesterday’s mascara still on. For many foggy year’s we accept this existence and are totally content and even proud of it because well, we’re mom’s!

What we often don’t realize is that we begin to let this role consume us and become our only identity. We lose ourselves in all the mom groups, playdates, PTO’s, being Room Mom, and Mommy & Me classes.

I became so consumed by my role and my excuses, that I lost who I was. I had no hobbies, no interests, no existence outside of motherhood.

I wanted desperately to do my absolute best at raising 3 impressionable little humans because when I commit to something, I go all in!! I wanted to be a strong example of what to be or to look for in a woman, wife and mother when they grow up. But how could I do MY best if a key component in my life was missing…ME?!

So, just like most of us did in our college years, it was time to find myself again!

How I did that is for another post. What I want to know today is, can you relate?! Please tell me I’m not alone! In fact, I know I’m not because many of my mom friends, from my mom’s groups, that write for mom’s blogs, have shared similar stories.

What I can share today is, to be the best Mom, you can be for your kids, you have to be YOU! Take time for yourself. Invest in yourself outside of the title M-O-M. Be intentional with your personal development, health and fitness. Learn to love yourself and even like yourself a little. Gain some confidence, find new interests and give yourself grace in the process.

When you become fully YOU, you become a better mom than you ever were before.

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